


who once said are we still there yet?

by sandyk



Category: Happy Endings (TV)
Genre: F/M, Post Series, all reunions and revivals ignored, she got them thangs!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:02:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28233606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: Something happening's with Penny and Dave!
Relationships: Penny Hartz/Dave Rose
Comments: 10
Kudos: 16
Collections: Yuletide 2020





	who once said are we still there yet?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [red_b_rackham](https://archiveofourown.org/users/red_b_rackham/gifts).



> not mine, no profit garnered. title from amy rigby's are we still there yet?

Penny said, "So are we doing this, are we really doing this?" and Dave leaned in. This was totally happening.

"Here we go," Max said loudly, slamming his hands down. Penny screamed and jumped off the couch. Dave screamed in a higher register and fell off the couch. 

"Where are you? Why are you here? What the fuck, Max?" Dave said. Penny was just whirling around, definitely not twirling. Twirling was for happiness, whirling was for combat. 

Max was on the stairs. He was disturbingly close to naked, even more frightening than actual nakedness which Penny could point and laugh at. Max was wearing only brand new bright white tidey whities. Penny and Dave had a great view because Max was sprawled on his back and there was always a lot of Max to see. 

Penny said, "Max, you can't just break in and hang out here, eavesdropping and generally spying."

"Sorry, Pen In a Pokey Dokey, I don't believe that you believe that those rules apply to me. You know who I am, don't pretend you don't. It was inevitable, probably from the day we met," Max said. He stood up and walked into the kitchen, immediately opening the fridge. "Why do you have all this takeout from that new Ethopian restaurant? Heh," he said, peeking his head over the door. "The thing about Ethio--"

"Stop," Dave said. "Max, can you go now? We were having a discussion, we were talking right here!"

"I know," Max said. "I was listening to all of it. I called Jane halfway through but she was in the middle of a car sale and refused to listen along with me. I'll text her the update."

"Awesome, please do that on the way out," Penny said, closing the fridge door nearly on Max's head. He yelped but managed to hold onto the large chunk of delicious _injera_ in his mouth. "I look forward to everything you and Jane have to say about this which I will definitely ignore but in the meantime, please get out of my house."

Max said, "Condo." He grabbed one of Penny's favorite Bassett by Angela Bassett, an Angela Bassett Collection robes (one of Angela Bassett's many collections) and barely bothered to tie the silky soft belt around his waist. "I'm taking this."

"I know," Penny said. 

Dave stood by Penny as they watched Max leave. It was not a graceful exit. Then Dave started looking in all the cabinets and Penny did a quick scan of the upstairs before coming down the same stairs Max had been lurking upon. She sat back down on the couch. Dave sat down next to her. He said, "Did that ruin the moment? Is the moment forever gone?"

Penny said, "If one simple Max invasion can end a moment, it wasn't a moment at all. Not for the two of us."

"Poetic," Dave said, nodding. "Also true. I say seize the moment! Let's give them something to talk about!"

"Whatever happened to Bonnie Raitt? She had that great hair," Penny said. 

"She really did, foxy blues lady," Dave said. "Oh, I can google it." Dave had recently become convinced he had excellent Google skills, and that Google skills was an actual thing. 

"We can wait," Penny said. "Maybe that's a post kiss and whatever comes after activity."

"Yes," Dave said. "I really like that idea. Let's do that right now."

She kissed him and he kissed her and it was so much less awkward than Penny expected. Then the things they did after that was very much less awkward until they were super awkward and then they went great. Just really really great. 

"Huh," Dave said. "I didn't expect the sex to be that good. Obviously I didn't think it would be bad but you know, you speculate. You make assumptions."

"Huh," Penny said. "I think I had similar assumptions but I was going to say it in a way that was less insulting. Or maybe more insulting? I don't know. Let's say everything was good."

"We can not only say it, we can believe it. I believe it. Do you?"

"We do," Dave said, sitting up. "We're communicating great right now."

"We totally are, we totally are not," Penny said. "We can do this, right?"

"We can," Dave said. 

Penny said, "I kinda thought maybe you'd be bad in bed, probably. Alex had implied. Or stated outright. I know that was years ago. She was pretty positive about the second time around. And you've had a lot of friendly sexual guests."

"Is that what we're calling it?" Dave looked up. "I like sexy guest gals or sexy guest guys."

"Just leave out the implication of friends, huh?" Penny reached for her shirt. 

"No, no, if you don't mind," Dave said, pushing her hand slightly. "You got them thangs and I love seeing them. And maybe touching them again? That part was and is beyond expectations."

"Aww," Penny said. "Loving them yabbos, huh?"

Then they had sex again. "Better than the first time and the first time was pretty awesome-some-some," Dave said.

"We had some great something something thing," Penny said. "Our communication skills are clearly on the up and up."

"I wish there was more up and up but I'm not sixteen anymore," Dave said. 

"True, my sexual peak is rising and rising and yours is retreating in the rearview mirror." 

"Are you just trying to get me to go again?" Dave leaned back on the bed. "Like me, it won't work. I'm exhausted. You're wearing me out. With your rising sexual peak growing and climbing and summiting."

"In the heady air up there, what, what, that's an underappreciated Kevin Bacon movie," Penny said. She laid down next to him. "I won't mention it to Jane and everyone when they call. That you couldn't go three times. And that you thought sexy guest gals was a good idea."

Dave said, "It is a good idea. Alliteration, guest guy or guest gal. Add in the sexy to indicate that they're getting more than typical hospitality."

"Depends on the place offering the hospitality?" Penny put her shirt on. "Basically, we're killing it. As friends and people having sex, perhaps people in a relationship? Perhaps. Maybe that's moving too fast."

"Maybe it's not too fast," Dave said. "It's really been years and years if you think about it."

"If we ignore the very real relationships we had in those years, then sure," Penny said.

"Well, let's not do that then," Dave said. "But at least we're dating. We can go that far. We'll do that again."

"Sex?" 

"Yes, and also this moment of bonding and communication," Dave said. "We did it!"

"Here we went," Penny said. "And will go again!"

"Exactly," Dave said. "I look forward to seeing them thangs again!"


End file.
